do women with executive presence roar
24th January 2014How do I get my colleagues to like me?
3rd February 2014Managing difficult people and conversations in a meeting – with aikido?
How can you manage difficult conversations with body language?
Great morning with the freelance sales reps at Wella this week! I’m one of Wella’s ‘business gurus’ and we went through the ‘Five Facets’ course (aka ‘The Power of Presence’) together – good fun as always.
Groups always love the little tips and tricks I teach in the course. The fifth ‘facet’ is Positioning – which brings all the other areas together to make a powerful impact or presence. There area a lot of ways to amplify your presence to succeed in your objectives, while remaining authentic.
Great morning with the freelance sales reps at Wella this week! I’m one of Wella’s ‘business gurus’ and we went through the ‘Five Facets’ course (aka ‘The Power of Presence’) together – good fun as always.
Groups always love the little tips and tricks I teach in the course. The fifth ‘facet’ is Positioning – which brings all the other areas together to make a powerful impact or presence. There area a lot of ways to amplify your presence to succeed in your objectives, while remaining authentic.
One technique to keep in your memory bank is the ‘Aikido crossover’. This is a handy strategy I learned from my own guru, Dawna Markova, to use when you are in a meeting or situation where you need to ‘take back’ or ‘cut’ the other person’s energy. Maybe they’re being argumentative, taking a counter position, or just being unhelpful – this is a simple way to energetically ‘put them in their place’ while still maintaining a non-aggressive, powerful and positive presence.
How to get the upper hand in a business setting:
1 – Visualise their intention toward you as a color or shape and imagine you want to work through it, not against it
2 – Wait until they’re stationary – seated or standing
3 – Make your way toward them and come up from behind
4 – Intentionally lean over their right shoulder or side and cross your right arm in front of them – say, by putting a piece of paper on the table or picking something up
5 – Make a quick comment fairly close to their ear – such as ‘Oh, sorry, just need this’ or something simple
6 – Move away and disengage
7 – Establish your positive presence and intention – refocus on what you’re committed to in this matter.
So why does this simple trick work to manage difficult people and conversations?
With your motion, you disrupt their energy or ‘Ki’ in ‘AiKIdo’ which causes them to become off balance. If you then reassert your own, calm energy and intention while they are in disruption, you gain an advantage. You remain fully connected, by visualizing going ‘through’ their obstacle you avoid resistance and backlash, and you’re mindfully influencing a situation rather than mindlessly reacting to it.
Lots of powerful business lessons can be learned from martial arts – so don’t be afraid to branch out in your leadership influences!
It sounds a little ‘airy fairy’ to some – but it does work! Try it and see how you get on.
How to get the upper hand in a business setting:
1 – Visualise their intention toward you as a color or shape and imagine you want to work through it, not against it
2 – Wait until they’re stationary – seated or standing
3 – Make your way toward them and come up from behind
4 – Intentionally lean over their right shoulder or side and cross your right arm in front of them – say, by putting a piece of paper on the table or picking something up
5 – Make a quick comment fairly close to their ear – such as ‘Oh, sorry, just need this’ or something simple
6 – Move away and disengage
7 – Establish your positive presence and intention – refocus on what you’re committed to in this matter.
So why does this simple trick work to manage difficult people and conversations?
With your motion, you disrupt their energy or ‘Ki’ in ‘AiKIdo’ which causes them to become off balance. If you then reassert your own, calm energy and intention while they are in disruption, you gain an advantage. You remain fully connected, by visualizing going ‘through’ their obstacle you avoid resistance and backlash, and you’re mindfully influencing a situation rather than mindlessly reacting to it.
Lots of powerful business lessons can be learned from martial arts – so don’t be afraid to branch out in your leadership influences!
It sounds a little ‘airy fairy’ to some – but it does work! Try it and see how you get on.
